Relationships

Each relationshp you have with another person reflects the relationship you have with yourself. -Alice Deville

What's On the Beside Table

So, I've not posted anything in a while, but wanted to share what I've been reading. It is an older book by Sarah Ban Breathnach, author of Simple Abundance (which I read years ago, and still periodically read passages from). The title is Excavating Your Authentic Self and it was published in 1998. Several times over the years I've browsed the book at the bookstore, but never bought it because it didn't apply to me. Didn't apply to my life. My authentic self was well and fine, thank you, and didn't need digging up. I mean, it wasn't buried. At least, I didn't think so.

When I picked this book up (from Goodwill) and started reading, I realized how wrong I had been. I completely fit the profile for an authentic self buried. And so. I think I'm going to need a big shovel.

Stay tuned.

This should be interesting.

the babies are here!!!

Look at these precious angels!! My great-nephew, Wallace, and my great-niece, Virginia, born on April 13, 2010, weighing in respectively at 5 lbs. 13 oz. and 5 lbs. 5 oz. Are these not the sweetest little ones you have ever seen????

think,think,think

People who don't think probably don't have brains; rather, they have grey fluff that's blown into their heads by mistake. ~Winnie the Pooh

Yup! Can relate to ole' Pooh Bear today as I dig my way through the grey fluff looking for something close to meaningful thought. So.... think, think, think, I was trying to think of something to wake my sleepy brain and remembered something profound I read (somewhere?). If you sit quietly and listen to your thoughts as they go by... just let them flow... don't judge them... don't get caught up in them... just listen and observe. Then realize that the real YOU is not the person thinking those thoughts... the real YOU, the soul of you, is the "thing" observing the person having the thoughts. I don't know; I tend to think it is just my brain multi-tasking. But performing this act reminds me much of trying to imagine the infiniteness of the universe; the frustration of not being able to clearly imagine infiniteness. I keep going back to "but what is outside the universe?" And my mind becomes boggled. And guess what? This brain exercise defeats the purpose. Because it is a dead end. And dead ends make me..... sleepy.

If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn't. ~Lyall Watson

my name is Kathijane and I am an addict....

Well, I certainly hate to paste this nasty, ugly photo of a burning cigarette into my pretty little blog, but here it is in all its filth (but without the stench). How ridiculous is this? I don't mind the nasty, ugly smoke going into my pretty little lungs, but don't want a picture of it on my blog? Yes, ridiculous! But then, no one has ever claimed addicts are totally rational people. Especially when it comes to their addictions. So, okay, as of now, I am an addict. But in 19 days I will be able to claim myself a "recovering addict." I'm preparing to quit the cigarette habit on May 1st. In doing so, I'm coming face to face with the reality that is "smoking". Facing those things which I've always known, but never wanted to hear. You know, like the fact that the stuff in cigarettes, well it is stuff that shouldn't be going into the human body: butane (think lighter fluid), cadmium (as in batteries), methane (that would be sewer gas), hexamine (barbeque lighter), ammonia (toilet cleaner), methanol (rocket fuel), among other nice things such as nicotine (and accompanying insecticides), arsenic, and carbon monoxide. I mean, I'm not an idiot, because I wouldn't drink lighter fluid, eat a battery, or stick my head in the sewer. But I am an idiot because.... well, smoking... I might as well be doing all those things and then some... downing some rocket fuel while washing my hair with the toilet cleaner. But, what can I say? other than.... I am an addict.

For now, I'm trying to focus on the positives of quitting:

After quitting:

20 minutes Blood pressure, pulse rate and temperature of hands and feet return to normal.

8 hours Nicotine level is now fallen to only 6.25% of normal peak during smoking.

12 hours Blood oxygen level returns to normal.

24 hours Anxieties peak but should normalize within 2 weeks - this is the most critical part, where success depends on this 2 weeks period.

48 hours Damaged nerve endings start to regrow while your smell and taste return to normal; anger and irritability peaks.

72 hours Breathing becomes easier and lungs functional abilities increase with 100% nicotine-free and almost 90% of its by products should have been passed down via urine; symptoms of chemical withdrawal syndrome like restlessness peak.

10 to 14 days Recovery is likely where addiction no longer in place; blood circulation to gum and teeth normalize.

2 weeks to 3 months The risk for heart attack starts to drop and lungs functional begins to improve.

3 weeks to 3 months Blood circulation improves substantially and any chronic cough would have disappear.

1 to 9 months No more fatigue and shortness of breath; cilia have regrow to help to keep your lungs clean and reducing risk of lung infection.

1 year Risk of coronary heart disease dropped to half of a smoker.

1 to 5 years Risk of stroke declined to half of a non-smoker.

10 years Risk of lung cancer declined by half of an average smoker

15 years Risk of coronary heart disease is now that of a person who never smoked.

brain pushups

From Wellsphere:

We all yawn when we're tired, but who knew that it was actually good for us? In fact, it is essential for maintaining optimal brain health, says neuroscientist Andrew Newberg, MD, director of the Center for Spirituality and the Mind at the University of Pennsylvania.

Yawning triggers neural activity in parts of the brain that control its temperature and metabolism.

Newberg recommends yawning 10 times in a row per day. He claims that combining this ritual with a healthy lifestyle will help you relax more effectively than meditation, stay focused on important ideas and concepts, and generate more compassion and empathy for others.

So here it is almost the middle of April and I have yet to post anything to my blog this month. And the reason is.... because.... because.... I've been, yAwn, exercising my brain. Yup. Incessant yawning as I find myself in one of those sleepyhead-foggy-brained-can't-wake-up periods, sleep walking through life, and all the energy I can muster goes to getting through the day. Nothing excites me, nothing makes me wonder, and there are no creative musings on the world around me. As a matter of fact, I don't think I can wring one ounce of creativity from this old brain.

Which, ironically, does make me wonder... what is creativity all about? That is a subject that has always intrigued me. Why can one be so full of it one day, and the next, it is gone. Poof. Just gone. And no matter what you do, you can't get it back. So you go on about your life, sleepwalking, until just as quickly as it left, poof, it is back! An uncreative dry spell, that is where I am.

But according to Elizabeth Gilbert (you know her - Eat, Pray, Love), creativity or no, you gotta keep showing up. Whether your creativity shows up or not, YOU have to show up. Because one never knows at what moment creativity might sneak back into your life.

So... here I am.... just showing up.

YAwn.